DO YOU HAVE A SUCCESSFUL SMILE?
Improve your chances of success with an Extreme Smile Makeover at Screamy Dental Associates!*
Smile with Whiter! Brighter! Healthier! Teeth!
After undergoing our Extreme! procedures, your teeth will be so bright they cause photokeratitis! Your teeth will be more dangerous than snowboarding!! Not EXTREME enough? How about exploding fillings!!!**
SMILE until you are so PRETTY and HEALTHY that your body assumes a kale smoothie form!!!
Your teeth will be STRAIGHTER and SHARPER than ever before! SCREAMY DENTISTRY is like a sweater vest and ammo belt for every tooth!
Say, cowboy, are those AMERICAN TEETH?!
SMILE AROUND MORE DENTISTRY THAN YOU CAN FIT IN YOUR FACE!!
Pull the Teeth of Success out of the Lake of Extreme Dentistry and prepare to RULE CAMELOT!!***
Our dentistry is so extreme it has been banned in 13 states! What do you mean you don’t think that is a good metric for health-related procedures? Are you going to let those commie pussies in Oregon tell you how Extreme! your dental care should be?! OH HELL NO!!
Dentistry … without a parachute!
Dentisterie … sans frontières!!
Dentistry … BLASTING THROUGH YOUR MOUTH HOLE!!!
“Dentistry” … A MICHAEL BAY PRODUCTION STARRING ANNE HATHAWAY, COMING JULY 2014****
* Name changed from the junk mail that inspired this.
** Patient assumes all liability for injury or distress to patient and others.
*** Screamy Dental Associates does not guarantee a golden age.
**** Not really. We got carried away. Make your appointment today!